Too many feelings. Too many lasts.
Last time I walk by the cathedral. This amazing building I’ve been blessed to have the pleasure of walking by multiple times each day for the past five months. I just want to reach out and hug it as I pass it by. I’m going to miss this beautiful city with the old buildings and the clearest blue skies I’ve ever seen. I wish it wasn’t goodbye.
Last lunch with my host family. My host mom prepares the same vegetable soup we eat each Monday. “Lunes=verduras” This is what my host mom believes. Lately, I’ve been complaining an awful lot about the food in my homestay and the food in Spain in general. Surely, I love American food and crave it so much. But today I don’t mind. I enjoy this last bowl of soup and the company of my host mom and sister as we watch the television (something else I’ve had to get very accustomed to in my time here). We’re commenting on what’s going on in the television all knowing that this is a big day. After lunch my host sister brings me a bag- a little goodbye gift. I bought my se�ora chocolates and wrote out a card thanking her for everything and for the memories.
I wish to keep in touch with Manuela and Maria. You get close to people when you live with them for so long. I asked my se�ora if she had a Facebook. She told me yes- and she was surprised that we also have “fac-e-book” in the US. Why yes, we do happen to have Facebook in the US… 🙂
My se�ora and Maria have to leave to get back to school. They help me down with my bags and my se�ora mentions for the second time to me how it feels as if it were just yesterday we were lugging these bags up the stairs. Five months later, five very quick months and we have to take them back down. Fuller than ever. Now containing all that I brought from the US in addition to all of the things I’ve acquired here in Europe. My se�ora is right. It does feel like just yesterday and it saddens me that this experience has to come to an end.
We have to say goodbye on the street when we part ways. We give each other besos and I start to tear up. Everything is becoming too real.
So much is running through my head. I think back to first arriving in Seville. I remember feeling terribly helpless in this city knowing nothing about it or about getting around it. I remember struggling for words and having the hardest time forming sentences. I was so shy and unsure.
Last walk through the city. Last chance to take it all in. Thank God I’ve had 5 whole months to take it all in because it’s just so beautiful I find myself overwhelmed in these last moments.
Last airport bus ride. Last time passing through the part of town David and I made our home for two weeks. Brings back such wonderful memories. On my way to the airport today I smiled proud- thinking how far I’ve come in these five wonderfully fulfilling months. Not only do I know my way around this city that was once so big and new- I’ve made it my home. Seville will always have a very special place in my heart. I’ve improved my language abilities so much as well.
Last time in the Seville airport. So many amazing memories here as well. Arriving with Emily. Finding Jessica and David after baggage claim. Flying out of here to Barcelona. Flying home to the US and right back into this airports open arms in one weekend. The amazing feelings flush back of when I checked the screen so many times when I was taking my first solo flight between Seville and Barcelona to meet Emily. When Jessica and I entered this airport and set off on our trip of a lifetime.
Oh, it’s so hard to say goodbye. So many wonderful memories that I would give anything to hit rewind and play back again and again. What helps me accept that this chapter in my life is over is the fact that it will always live on in my memories. I’ve had amazing visits with people I love, made incredible friends, and learned so much- about Spain and Spanish of course, about life and most importantly about myself.
This experience has changed me. I can already feel that as I sit here in the airport waiting to check my luggage back to the states. I know, however, that no matter how changed I feel in this moment I still don’t know the importance this experience has had on me. I think once I go home and settle back into my life I will do and see things differently. This is when I’ll know for sure how I’ve changed.
I’m in the airport. I was stressed out hoping my baggage wasn’t too heavy and that I could carry on all that I needed to. Luckily the woman at the checkin desk let my bag go even though it was too heavy. So far everything has gone so smoothly- and I’m really thankful. Now just my flight to Lisbon and 14 hours in the airport. I will try to pass the time reading. But mostly I think I will be reflecting and writing in my journal as I wait to board my flight back to my hometown.
I’m still in Seville now, though it already feels like I’m gone. I have one hour until my plane boards. Leaving it all behind…. It’s not as easy as I thought it would be.
My last cry here in Spain. The last time my emotions will get the best of me as I board the last plane- one that takes me one step closer to the end of this experience.
Goodbye, dear Sevilla. Thank you for the wonderful memories. I can’t wait to see you again someday!

Location: Aeropuerto de Sevilla, Sevilla, España