This would be Rembrandt’s interpretation of the biblical story of the Prodigal Son. There are six people in the portrait, and their faces are all painted so show varying intensities of light. It is thought that brighter faces imply that those people have more understanding and compassion for the down-and-out man in the lower left than those with the darker faces. One person (the sixth) is painted in such dark a light that he is barely visible in this shot.

2) The Peacock Clock

In my opinion, it’s the most interesting curio in the Hermitage, in what was once one of Catherine the Great’s private galleries. It is in perfect working order, but it only “chimes” once a week, I believe. But of course it doesn’t actually chime. When it was operating on an hourly basis, the peacock would (hourly) spread its wings and move its head. It is an incredibly impressive piece given that it has no electric components and was made over 200 years ago by English jeweler and goldsmith James Cox. The time is told at the base of the clock by a little rotating toadstool.

3) The “Just for Show” Throne Room

While this looks like (and indeed is) a throne room, it was never used as one. At all. To show the excesses of Russian aristocracy, we find in the Hermitage a throne room that was only built for display and had no functional purpose. Peter the Great is pictured in the portrait above the throne.

4)  The REAL Throne Room

Here we have the actual throne of the Russian Tsars, and this picture doesn’t show the magnificent expanse of the room behind where I took the picture. This throne, like all symbols of imperial Russia, as well as the tapestry and drapes, were to be destroyed in the wake of the 1917 revolution. They were never destroyed, because they were hidden away at an undisclosed location where the revolutionaries would never find it. Only after the fall of the USSR was the throne room restored as it appears in this picture.

It sounds like a stupid thing to say, but it’s true. It is very possible to take a wrong turn in Russia and end up in the Soviet Union. I did, just last week. This (dated 2012) mural/graffiti hybrid glorifies the victory of the Red Army (and the Union in general), and behind it is a run-down Soviet-era factory, still productively churning out smoke from its towers. The past is still very much alive here, and it varies from street to street. Sometimes, it looks as if you were in imperial Russia. Sometimes, it looks to be the present. Sometimes, you’d swear you were in the Soviet Union. Pick a street you’ve never taken before, and it’s a matter of chance what era you’ll find yourself strolling through.

2) Crossing the frozen river.

When I saw a woman playing fetch with her dog on the frozen Fontanka river, I thought she was a little nutty. But as I walked along and saw five more people doing the same, I realized that on the coldest days, the river becomes a sort of park. People cut across to take shortcuts, and couples walk down the centre holding hands. So I figured I’d take a stroll on the ice myself, heading west toward the Neva River and the Gulf of Finland.

3) Don’t worry, Boris, that’ll buff right out: Russian Road Rage

In the 90s, you used to be able to bribe your way to a driver’s license. That being the case, a lot of people never actually passed avtoshkola (auto school), and that endless list of “Russian Car Crash” videos online is reality. The roads are very unsafe here, and I’ve had three or four close calls. Just yesterday, I saw a pedestrian almost get hit by a car. He promptly kicked the front of the car with his heel, which made the driver get out and fistfight with him. What can I say? It’s a rougher culture. But it is common to see cars zooming down the road with missing headlights or two smashed-in doors. Auto inspection, from what I can see, is very lax. But the crown jewel of Russian Autos is this jalopy I found along the Griboyedova Kanal. From what I can tell, before that front tire got blown out, the driver was taking this hot-rod around the city with a front-passenger door that was held on ENTIRELY WITH TAPE.

That also brings up ‘hitchhiking culture” of Russia. In the U.S., I would never think of hitching a ride with someone. But in Russia, I have already done it, because it is a convenient way of getting around. When the USSR fell, the state-run cab company went down the drain. So suddenly, opportunity knocked, and everyone started becoming freelance moonlighter-taxis to make a few extra roubles. If you’re looking out into the street for a cab, don’t be surprised if a normal car pulls over and its driver asks where you’re headed and invites you to hop in. That’s what happened to me, and I didn’t even have my HAND OUT yet – all I was doing was looking down the street. In America, I would never feel safe doing that, but in Russia, it’s routine operation.